


The Newest Problem with Tony Stark

by shinkonokokoro



Series: Problems with Tony Stark [2]
Category: The Avengers
Genre: Kid!Fic, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-11
Updated: 2011-10-11
Packaged: 2017-10-24 12:28:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/263470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shinkonokokoro/pseuds/shinkonokokoro
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Another problem with Tony Stark: He was the Avengers greatest asset. He also happened to be their greatest liability.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Newest Problem with Tony Stark

**Author's Note:**

> Kind of picked and chose what Avengers I like... :) Also, I know Tony as a kid in canon has brown hair, but I saw a pic of RDJ as a kid and he was blonde and adorable.

The problem with Tony Stark when it wasn't Tony Stark himself was that he was the Avengers' greatest asset. He was their go-to guy for tech and money and space and (on extremely rare occasions) advice. He was also an excellent tactical planner, stuck to his guns, kept his head under fire, and had a mind for strategy. If he weren't so independent and distracted off the battle field and out of the planning room, he would have made an excellent soldier. He was one of the team's most mobile members, being capable of aerial work, hard-hitting, and both long and close-range fighting.

However, as Tony was their greatest asset, he was also one of their biggest liabilities. And this, to be fair, wasn't all Tony's fault. If Tony was taken out, then the team lost all of those things. It also meant there was no one to step up to explain technology or fix any of Tony's gadgets if something went wrong. Heaven forbid someone actually try to make sense of the man's plans. And good luck pinning him down long enough to write an instruction manual.

It made Steve grateful that their enemies didn't realise the quickest way to put them in the ground would be to remove Tony Stark from the equation and then hit them with some sort of technological attack. So he guarded Tony's back a little more carefully than the others. A good soldier knew that he had to protect his assets.

Except for today. Today they'd gotten separated. Which resulted in Tony being hit with some sort of beam that sent him flying into a crumpled heap of—intact—armour. Steve and Thor had double teamed the flavour-of-the-day villain and Natasha bound him more tightly than necessary.

“To—Iron Man? Iron Man, can you hear me?” Steve demanded, kneeling next to his fallen friend.

“Fine. I'm fine. I can't—the armour's out of sync. I can't move it. You'll have to get Thor to carry me back or something,” came the mechanised voice. Even if it did sound strained.

“Thank God.” Steve sat back on his heels, the rest of the team gathering close. “You're not hurt, are you?”

“No. No no. I'm fine. I'm okay. I'll take it off in my workshop. Steve, help me up.”

He got behind him and lifted under his shoulders, Thor taking his feet.

“Shit. This is embarrassing.”

Natasha and Clint laughed, Thor trying his best to smother his grin.

“Alright. Let's go,” Steve said. “Natasha, report to Fury. We'll meet you back at the mansion.

* * *

“If I prop you up, can you stand?” Steve asked as everyone else left the workshop.

“I...don't think so. Um... grab the whirly wrench from my workbench.”

“I know what a socket wrench is, Tony.” Steve rolled his eyes.

“Yeah. Right. Um. Okay, listen. Steve. I'm not... I'm not really okay. I'm—Jesus! I'm fine! Don't attack my armour, you monkey! I'm not wounded. That beam made me different.”

Steve stilled his hands and pulled back. “Different?” Moving again, he hurried the nuts and bolts out carefully, removing gauntlets, boots, helmet, and finally the chest piece, gaping.

Tony shifted his small limbs, flushing. “See....”

“Oh my God. Tony. You're adorable!” Reaching out slowly, Steve petted the round cheeks and touched dusty blonde hair. “You were a blonde as a kid?”

Flushing more, Tony batted his hands away. “Get me out.”

Steve obliged and pulled him from the suit, holding him out in front of him with a sort of awe. “Oh my gosh. Look at your pouty lips!”

“Yes, yes. We all know how strong you are. Now put me down!” he snapped, the child-voice higher and softer. “Damn, this sucks!”

Steve sat on a bench and tucked Tony into his lap. “Tony! You were—are—such an adorable child.”

“So you've said. Now stop it! You realise this means we can't have sex, right? Unless you're into that.”

Steve felt his face pull into an expression of horror. “No! I could never do that!”

“Yeah. See,” he said grumpily, folding his arms across his chest in a sulk.

“What are we going to tell the others?”

“I'd rather tell them nothing, but I have no idea how to fix this.”

“We'll have to to question General What's-his-name then.

Humming in agreement, Tony topped off Steve's lap and ran a finger through is hair in a gesture so Tony that Steve wanted him full-size so he could push him up against the nearest wall. Or grab him up to his chest and cuddle him in a way that Tony never let him when he could wriggle his way out of it. “Well. May as well break the news.”

* * *

The Avengers all leapt to their feet and scrambled for their masks, someone screeching, “Oh my God! Is that your kid?!”

Steve blinked, sent an appalled look at Tony and then shook his head frantically, the words unable to come out of his mouth suddenly.

Tony let his hands drag down his face as he groaned. “Jesus. You're all insufferably dense...”

Interestingly, it was Peter, Spider-Man mask haphazardly over his face as he actually stood on the floor for once who got it. “Tony!?” And gaped, his chin hanging out of the bottom.

Tony put on his best people-pleaser grin (made heart-melting child-size), arms spread wide. “Surprise!”

Jessica slapped her hands over her mouth, but not before the words tumbled out. “Oh my God, you're adorable!”

Cheeks pinking, he coughed. “Right. Well. I don't know how to fix this...”

Thor frowned down at him, skirting the table, chin cupped in his hand. “Thou are even smaller now, my friend.”

Tony glared, the effect not at all intimidating with his round cheeks and soft hair. Steve looked away so as to reduce the effect. “That's because I'm a child. I'm probably about eight or ten. Hard to say.

Jessica squeaked and ducked out of the room.

“You know...” child Tony drawled. “I usually am aware of my effect on women, but it hasn't been this potent in years.”

Steve snickered, stopping when Tony stamped a tiny foot on his own.

“Am I really that charming?”

“Like you need that ego boost,” Steve said at the same time Thor said, “Thou art truly an attractive human child.”

Tony preened.

“Oh for pity's...” Natasha stood suddenly.

“Hold on...” Peter said. “I think we're looking at this as too small of a problem...”

“Subtle, Peter. Really subtle.” Tony giggled though.

“Great,” Natasha said sourly. “This is not good.”

“Thanks, madame obvious,” Peter muttered, flopping himself into a chair.

“Where's Clint?” Tony asked.

“With Logan. They're in the kitchen. Discussing...something,” Natasha said.

“Right. Well...”

“We could wait to see if it wears off?” Peter suggested.

“That's never a good plan,” Tony said, folding his arms.

“We could ask Reed?” Steve said.

“Hey, why did Je—holy fuck,” Clint gaped at the sight of Tony, Logan's eyes widening behind him.

“What the...!”

“Logan. Clint. Nice of you to join us,” Tony said. “As you can see. I've been de-aged.”

Clint walked forward carefully, hand reaching out.

Tony rolled his eyes. “Idiot. I'm real and I'm myself. Logan?”

“Smells like him alright. Just not all the sex.”

Steve flushed and turned away. “Right! Well, then it looks like we're going to have to rework things so that our formation doesn't get thrown out of wack.”

“What? Steve, don't be ridiculous. I can still be a part of this team.” Tony frowned, his brow furrowing and cheeks dimpling with displeasure.

“Hell. No.”

Most of the team looked to Steve in surprise. He flushed as he realised the words that had passed his lips. “You're a...child! You're not going out to the front lines to fight!”

“Oh honestly... This is ridiculous...”

“Mom and Dad fighting...” Peter muttered.

“Shut it!”

“Hm. Yeah, that's awkward. Now that it looks like Dad and Son.”

“Peter,” Tony snapped. “Not. Helping.”

He grinned in response. “Ooh, what will Pepper say? She ever seen you as a kid?”

Tony unexpectedly turned pale. “Shit.” Then looked at Steve. “We are not done with this conversation. Rework the roster, whatever, but this does not get back to Pepper.” He looked around the room. “Do you all understand. I'll be in my workshop. Just tell her I'm unavailable. And at all costs, do not let her down there? Am I clear?”

Most of the members nodded, Clint, Natasha, and Peter smirking and giggling.

“I will do terrible things to you if you tell her,” he threatened, looking, again, adorable. And then fled downstairs.

Steve sighed. “Hopefully, that will keep him busy until we can get him back to normal. And keep him off the field.” People nodded around the room, wincing as a horrible racket of opera filled the house. “To-nyyyyy!!” Steve bellowed and stalked downstairs to bang on the -locked- workroom doors.

* * *

A week later and the problem still hadn't been solved. The crew had made vague excuses to Pepper, put off by actually getting a hold of him via phone, Tony using a voice modulator to recreate his voice. Mostly, though, he stayed hidden downstairs, the racket only rarely making it upstairs. Luck too, was on their side when it came to enemies. Apparently, no one really knew about Tony being out of the game. As Murphy's Law would have it, though, as soon as Steve muttered the thought to Peter, there was an alert for help from the Avengers.

“Go. Don't need a babysitter,” Tony's voice said over the intercom.

“Creepy how he does that,” Peter commented.

Steve grunted in reply and then hurried to his room for his uniform, meeting everyone in the lobby, rushing off to the site given to them by Fury. In the midst of battle, just when things could go both ways, when he was wishing for Tony's cheeky presence, a small silver armoured figure swooped in over the battle and blasted the crazed man-ape gone-wrong thing with his repulsors and then knocking out some of its servant bots in a few swift moves that made Steve jealous of his smarts.

“Checking in for duty!” the figure said, dropping in front of Steve with a jaunty salute.

“I'm going to kill you... I hope you know that,” Steve grit out, glowering as he let his shield loose. Fortunately, Tony was easy to keep an eye one, despite his aerial acrobatics. And when the fight was over, Steve clamped a hand onto Tony's armoured wrist and dragged him back to the mansion, much to the amusement of everyone else.

“He's really going to get it...” Peter commented lowly as everyone petered off towards their own rooms to leave the two of them to fight.

Steve was a little bit grateful, a little bit ashamed that his demeanour told them they'd need to clear off to give them space. “Take it off,” Steve ordered, voice low and rough.

Tony snorted inside the helmet, the noise translating fuzzily.

“Take it. Off. You deliberately disobeyed me, Tony.”

“Oh come on... You needed help. I put this together just in case. You can't honestly expe—”

“What if you were hurt.” Steve folded his arms over his chest and glared down at Tony, knowing his glare was not at all adorable and endearing.

“I wasn't.”

“You always do this, Tony!” Steve hissed, trying hard to keep the volume down. “You're careless with your own life even when you know there are others that care for you and don't want to see you hurt.”

The helmet rolled side to side like Tony was easing his shoulders before the faceplate flipped up and the armour set aside on the table. “You looked like you needed help. I wanted to help,” he said sullenly, lips pouty and eyes downcast.

Steve sighed. This was going to be harder than he thought. “Listen, Tony. I understand that you want to help. I really do. I just.. You can't go out there as you are. You're just a kid—”

“Physically!”

“Physically,” Steve conceded, “but kids are more fragile, and I don't want anything to happen to you. You understand.”

“You're talking to me like I'm a child, Steve.”

“For all your years, Tony, you behave like a child. Now you've just got the appearance of one as well.”

“Harsh,” he said mildly, looking up to meet Steve's eyes.

“But is it false?”

Tony shrugged.

“Tony.”

“I need to help, okay!” He snapped finally. “I need to...” His hands balled into little fists

Steve knelt to eye-level. Put his hands on Tony's shoulders, only then noticing how big they really were. “And I need to protect.”

Tony blinked at him in surprise, eyes looking a little bright.

“I need you to be okay. You're so little. I can't... I don't want you getting hurt. I need you safe. And if you being safe is not in the field, then I can do my job. Properly.”

“You've been protecting me...” Tony said dully, looking unhappily at the floor. “I still...” His voice broke and he sighed, looking up towards the ceiling and blinking.

Oh. “Oh Tony... It's not... It's not because you're not capable!” Steve said quickly, pulling him in for a hug. “It's not because I don't trust you... It's because you're our most valuable asset! Geeze!”

“What?” He leaned stiffly against Steve's shoulder.

“If you go out, who's going to fix our tech? Who's going to get us the answers that we need lightning fast? You're so smart, Tony. Look at what you've been able to do!”

“Because I'm not a superhero?”

“But you are. And what's even more impressive is that you've done it all on your own, Tony.” He felt Tony relax against him, and stroked his back gently.

“Okay. Enough,” he said softly. “Careful of boosting my ego too much.”

Steve laughed softly. “Your ego is a strange thing, Tony. You might be one of the most insecure confident men I've ever met.” He felt the giggles before he heard them.

“You sure know how to turn a compliment...”

“Mm. Now will you please stay safe until you're back to normal?”

“I'll stay safe, Steve, but I won't stay away.” Tony stepped back, taking hold of one of Steve's hands in both of his smaller ones. “Because I can't not protect you too.”

Steve huffed, but the smile tugged at his lips anyway. “Tony Stark. Always has to do everything.” He stood. “Come on. I'm tired. Let's go to bed.”

Tony arched a brow at him. “I thought you didn't do—”

“Jesus, Tony. No. Not that.” He flushed. “To sleep.”

Tony grinned. “Alright. I guess I can handle that for a night.”

“You'll get to be my own personal teddy bear.”

Sticking out a tongue, he brushed passed Steve. “Ugh. No.”

* * *

Steve woke early with Tony curled entirely into his body. He could hardly contain his grin as he nuzzled the top of his head and nestled back into the bed to sleep some more.

He woke again later when Tony kicked him accidentally in the shin while trying to extricate himself to go to the bathroom. “Get off, you cling-on.” He stretched and padded to the bathroom in some drawstring shorts of Steve's that, on Tony, looked more like pants.

He grinned even wider, still stupid with sleep. “Tony, you're too adorable. I can't wait 'til you're bigger again. Then I can have sex with you...” He buried his nose in Tony's part of the bed, inhaling. “Show you how much I think you're adorable.” He dozed lightly, calling out when Tony didn't return after a short while. “What are you doing...?” Nothing. “Tony?” Then he was fully awake, bursting into the bathroom, cursing as the door cracked into something and Tony groaned. Deep and full-bodied. As in normal Tony sounds. He peered around the door and edged himself in to kneel next to Tony. “Are you okay?”

“Be better if you hadn't nearly brained me...” He groaned.

Steve smiled.

“You sicko. You're into masochism?” Tony accused as he lifted a hand to his head and tried sitting. "Gotta love those things that wear off by themself unexpectedly."

Grabbing him up, Steve carried him back to the bed and set him down, kissing him fiercely.

“H-hey! Might have...brain damage here...and you can only...think of...kissing me breathless?” he teased around Steve's lips.

The thought still caused him pause. “Oh geeze. I didn't really hurt you, did I?”

“I'm fine...”

“How come you're back to normal?”

“Steve...” Tony groaned,” you're not looking a gift horse in the mouth again, are you?”

Steve pulled back, kneeling over Tony. “Absolutely not. I just want... Well. Glad you're okay. Sex now?”

“Yes please.” And allowed himself to be ravaged fully.


End file.
